Saturday, September 22, 2007

dont go :(

Two things happened today…which made me ponder..about life..Yet again..

Firstly…I realized that time flies like anything.

My cousin is leaving for Australia on 27th. I am so happy for him..nevertheless it makes me so sad…seeing him go.

I remember moving to delhi when I was in class 5. We had a blast. The four of us. Skating in the rain on the roads; cycling early in the morning; playing cricket in the sun at 2 p.m. in the month of June and July. Sigh..those were the days…wish I could travel back in time and get back those innocent days; the innocent fights; the innocent discussions; and not to forget the games we ‘invented’.

Now ‘the four of us’ are in different worlds altogether. Sana in ahemdabad; Pulkit in Bombay; Pranjal in Australia; and me here…

Time actually flies.

Wish I had a video camera with me all the years so I could capture those times and look at them whenever I am down. I am definitely going to give my children a video camera as soon as they learn their abcs’!! I am going to miss him so much.

I may not see him for the next so many years..maybe two, three, four or five..and then the distance will set in, I will be busy in my life and he will be busy in his.

I find it very strange that we cry when we part with someone, we think about him all the time till a few days and then we tend to ‘forget about him’ like he goes into our subconscious and then our unconscious.

I find this strange…really strange….having said that I don’t think my life and thought process will not be much different…

As of now the very thought of parting with someone close to me gives me goosebumps!!

Sunday, September 9, 2007

He told me he’ll be there for me..

Always…

No matter what….

Even if the world turns against you…

I’ll be there..

To give you a hand..

To guide you…

To give you a shoulder to cry on…

To wipe your tears..

He said.

I trusted him…blindly…

This is life..they say…

Always unfair

Always unkind

When I needed him

He wasn’t there

He turned against me

I watched him…fighting back tears..

Tears of betrayal

Tears of disbelief

Tears of pure sadness..

I watched him stand opposite me

Standing against me

With the world..

I realized there is no such thing as perfect friendship..

Then I met another him..

I wanted perfect friendship…

But what I had forgotten was that there is NO such thing…

Things were not rosy

My expectations were high…

What he gave, were less as per my standards

Then one day something snapped…

I realized my mistake

I realized that I was trying to change him

I wanted him to become another him

Because I wanted him to be a perfect friend

I wanted him to say the nicest things

The nicest vows of friendships

Just like the earlier him

Now I can finally say I have learnt the following…

The nicest of words are not necessarily the truth

There is no such thing as the best friend or the bestest friend

Actions speak louder than words…

And that things always needn’t be expressed in words…